Now that I’ve started down this path of sharing my
experience, there’s a part of me that knows some of you have undergone such
ordeals in your life, that I feel mine pales by comparison. But I've told myself not to feel this way. Anything that affects me so deeply that my
emotions and life course are altered due to it, I have the right to experience
and express these feelings. And thereby, others who are going through
life-changing experiences can (hopefully) be inspired and realize that what they
are going through is completely normal.
There’s a certain level of shame that comes with admitting
heartbreak, a stigmatism we’ve tattooed on the emotion. As if by feeling,
we’re weak.
That’s far from the truth. In fact, I assure you that is
quite the opposite of the truth.
I do not have a PHD, or some fancy background in psychology,
I am just your “girl next door”, but I’m sharing the emotions and the cycles
I’m working through to hopefully help others struggling through ordeals in
their lives.
I believe the first step is admission that you have a right
to feel. You might reason, ‘The world doesn’t want to hear my problems. They
just want to hear about when I’m happy and have excitement to spread.’
This, in my opinion, is one fault of the modern world. It
breeds in those who are depressed that they should retreat and isolate
themselves until they are ‘feeling better’. It provides fuel to a volatile
situation because we cannot heal in darkness.
Now, I realize that it’s a proven fact that positive energy
attracts, but you have the right to feel the way you are. Acknowledge that you
have the right to take things how you emotionally respond, regardless of how
others may feel about your reaction.
No one person on this planet is happy all the time. Remember
that.
You’ll have people, I have no doubt, who may look on your
situation and say “get it together”, “why are you so emotional”, “will you stop
crying”.
Sometimes these voices even come from within. They can
originate from ‘programming’ through our childhood.
Here’s a good question, why are we trying to silence our
emotions when they are trying to tell us something is wrong?
If you were sick with a fever, would you dismiss the
symptoms—the lightheartedness, the dizziness, and the fact that an untreated fever can hurt you long-term? Or would you seek medical help?
The answer is obvious. You would seek medical treatment.
So, why when your heart, mind, and soul are telling you
‘something is out of whack here’, ‘I’m hurting’, ‘I feel lost’, do you ignore
it?
Did you know that if you bury these feelings of hurt, that
they are never going to leave your system? You are laying the foundation for
future stress-related illness, whether you may realize it or not.
1) Write down what you are grateful for every day. It
doesn’t have to be grandiose things. Maybe a stranger smiled at you, a baby
giggled, someone held the door open for you or brought you a coffee. Be
grateful for life and every aspect of it, no matter how minute. When
dwelling on what we are thankful for, the negative emotions are tampered down.
I’ll help you with this one. I’ve added gratitude post to the “I am a Shining Soul” Facebook page with a quick link to it on the right-hand sidebar. Share what you're grateful for. You can do it throughout the day, once a
day, or however many times you feel inclined. By sharing with the community,
you’ll also help lift up others.
2) Record your feelings in a journal. Like me initially, you
might not think you need to do this, but it is helpful.
3) Think of others and help them. It is said that the best
way to help ourselves is to help others. We need each other. Our energies
combine to make the world what it is. Are we contributing to a positive
society? This is something that will take more time because when we’re low, we
retreat and desire to isolate ourselves.
4) Remain encouraged. If you have a light inside, no matter
how faint, that is telling you that you have the right to be you then you are
on the right path.
Closing thoughts:
Most of us are familiar with Superman and Kryptonite.
View positive feelings, emotions, and energy as the ultimate Kryptonite
against negative feelings, emotions and energy.
Beautiful post, Carolyn. You go, girl!
ReplyDeleteThank you, Sandy. :)
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