When you think about it, we are grieving losses everyday, in many ways. Some things we might label small, some things we might label big. It might be the figure we had when we first got married. It might be the loss of a loved one or the ending of a relationship. Whatever losses we are going through are unique to us because each of us moves through the process of grieving at our own pace and in our own way. It is a process and a significant part of our journey in life.
Something I have learned along the way is when faced with loss, it is extremely important to honor yourself, honor your feelings. They are yours after all. They are there for you to acknowledge something—learn, heal and grow. Silencing them, pretending they aren’t there, putting on a happy face, burying them, will only slow down the healing process. It’s like trying to hold a beach ball under water. We will become exasperated from our efforts as the ball continually attempts to resurface.
So go easy on yourself. We live in a fast-paced society. There’s fast food, fast traffic, fast comforts on credit. We want everything now and to pay the price later. Well that doesn’t work when you say to yourself, “Fast. Get over your grief already!”
We have to slow down, get quiet, feel our feelings, cry, and pay the price of time and effort on our healing journey. The thing is if we don’t pay for it now, we will pay for it later – with interest!
It is in honoring yourself, giving yourself permission to feel what you feel, that you can then begin to open to ways of moving forward.
~ Sherry Buikema