We’ve mentioned the feelings of worthlessness that you feel when undergoing a painful experience. If we let it, this can fester beneath the surface and rear its ugly head in the most harmful way. If we allow it, these feelings can push us to the point where we actually believe that we’re not lovable. When that happens we can sabotage ourselves by becoming the type of person no one wants to be around.
We may alienate ourselves from our loved ones, even unintentionally. If you start to pay attention to what you say and do, you may realize that you’re acting out of character. Maybe you lose your temper more easily. Maybe you say harsh, or sarcastic things without even giving it any thought.
What you are doing in these cases is allowing your pain to rule your life. After all, someone else you cared for deeply broke your heart. It’s natural to start reasoning if they don’t love you, then why should anyone? You let this thought become a belief. This belief then grows into action and becomes your character. It’s possible that before you know it, another relationship is severed.
We have to remember that while we have to right to grieve, to pain, to cry, we can’t surrender our soul to the situation. We don’t want to give the heartbreak control over us. We have to reason this way, “Yes, I was hurt, but you can’t have my life.”
By reinforcing ourselves with positive mantras and by building up those who we love, who are around us, we will avoid taking our emotions out on them. We won’t project negative feelings to them. We won’t push them away with our energy that communicates, “I don’t need you.”
Instead, if we are able to get control over our emotions by realizing, “you know what? I am loved,” then things will start to turn around. You will feel your worth and this thinking will also serve to strengthen the relationships you do have.